The course felt like the perfect training for me for a number of reasons. It felt like it would solve a few problems, and bring a great richness to my life over the next two years.
Alongside the excitement butterflies, I was also aware of a different variety. These butterflies didn’t feel so friendly. They felt unsettled, fractious.
I dismissed them and carried on with my plans. This morning, just before I filled in the application form, I got some information which pointed me towards questioning my decision. This little space was enough to let me see how desperately I’d wanted this training to be ‘the answer’. I got suspicious. I realised that it was an attempt to fix something that couldn’t really be fixed.
I might do the training, and I might not, but I’m going to give myself more time and space to decide. Those anxious butterflies were right all along.
We have our twelfth reader of The Blue Handbag over at 100 Readers – go meet Heather Anastasiu and her lovely pink hair. There’s also a nice little review of the book here, thanks Donna!